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Monster

2014-10_Monster

You always wear a mask,  because if removed, people will see you as a monster. You know you stand out when you hide your face like that, but it is still better than to be hunted for who you are. A small mistake, and you will discover that the road from love to hate is swift and paved with excruciating pain.

But tonight you will take it off. Tonight you will be yourself, and still blend in. Just a few hours away, you can almost taste the dry autumn breeze, nipping at your tongue as you stick it out.

Tonight no one will judge you. Tonight you will be invisible. It is your one night of true freedom. Ah, what a feeling that will be!

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Summer of 2014

Summer of 2014

I remember the warm sweaty nights and the long hungry days.

I remember the busy early mornings, the lazy afternoons, and the restless evenings.

I remember the prayers, the good intentions, the virtues and my sins. And the hope for forgiveness.

I remember the desire to grasp purpose, and to embrace it.

I remember longing for a glimpse of my desire. A reason for my joy.

I remember the brief hellos and long goodbyes.

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Life (part 2)

Life Part 2Life is rules. Your own, or others’, no matter where they come from. And living by those rules. Moment by moment. Breath by breath. As time passes by.

Life is compromise. In anything and everything that comes your way. It’s the grey mix of realities rather than the black and white of dreams.

Life is happiness, and dreams. And belief in realization of those dreams. And to see them cut short  by the very reality with which you meant to wave the tapestry of life

Life is a journey. Sometimes you walk by yourself, sometimes among a crowd.  But every time you stop and look around, you are always alone. Frightened, you quickly look ahead and once again start walking.

Life is surprise. So unexpectedly sweet that it takes your breath away. So emotionally painful that it sucks your heart right out of your chest. And life carries on, until that last, expected surprise, and the end of dreams.

Life is love. The one that is strong but has to be sacrificed. The one that slips away. The one that you have but cannot appreciate. The one that you want but cannot have. The one that you see from far away. The one that leaves you, and there is no one left to whom you can complain.

Life

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Celebration

CelebrationOn May 17th, Norway celebrates the 200th anniversary of its constitution, and, as usual, the children’s parades form the central elements of the national celebration all around the country. In the capital Oslo, the children are in for a treat as according to tradition, all the city’s elementary schools parade past the King’s palace, where they get to greet the royal family, and the King himself!

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Two Planets

Two Planets

From the very first time I read this poem, I knew I was going to blog it. I just wasn’t sure when. As time passed by, it kept changing. Drawing energy from events around me, and from me. Always draping itself with shades of sadness somehow familiar if I only dared to slip beneath the calm surface of the ocean that fills my heart.

Today, although transformed, it is just as pure and deep as the first time I read it. Today, it has many meanings, woven together, just like life’s tangled relations. And just like life itself, happy or sad, you just have to endure it:

Two planets meeting face to face,
One to the other cried ‘How sweet
If endlessly we might embrace,
And here for ever stay! how sweet
If Heaven a little might relent,
And leave our light in one light blent!’

But through that longing to dissolve
In one, the parting summons sounded.
Immutably the stars revolve,
By changeless orbits each is bounded;
Eternal union is a dream,
And severance the world’s law supreme.

Poem by Muhammad Iqbal, the “Poet of the East”, from “The Call of the Road”
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Goodbye

I pray that when you read this, you are safely on the other side of the ocean.

It was good to have you here as always. Remember that I will always be eagerly awaiting your next visit, in whichever season it may be. And always receive you with a big smile.

Take with you all the good memories, leave behind any sad and awkward moments. Take with you the strength you gained, and keep with you the support you always have from this side of the ocean.

Remember that I am closer than your own heart. Closer than the distance between you and sadness. Closer than the time it takes for a tear to slide down your cheek.

Forgive me for all my shortcomings and mistakes. For my childish behaviour and immature nature. Look past my weaknesses and you will see goodness and friendship, and deep and genuine care. Look beyond it all and you will see yourself living in my heart.

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Perfection

Perfection

Your carefree smile,
your tears of frustration.

Your  playful laughter,
your heart-rending cries.

Your repertoire of sounds,
your unambiguous communication.

Your drive to explore,
your fear of the unknown.

Your boldness and trust in your abilities,
your confidence in me.

Your defiance and determination,
your obedience and cooperation.

Your anger and resilience,
your unconditional love.

In everything you do and everything you are, I see perfection.
You are honour, fame, power. You are Izza, and this will always be your day.

Happy birthday!

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Life

Life

Life is making choices, some easy, some hard. Sometimes knowing and sometimes unknowingly,  and then living by those choices. And always being wise after the event.

Life is a test. No, a series of tests, big and small. And you are taking them, like it or not. You’re taking them and may not even be aware. And the results? Well, by the time they are known, it will be too late for any retakes.

Life is wanting to be brave. Then realizing that happens only in movies, and the only time you  can really be brave is when life itself does not give you any alternatives. And you have a feeling that doesn’t really count, but you move on.

Life is acting. A role play to the world as time passes by. A pageant of smiles and frowns, sometimes on the outside, sometimes on the inside. The trick being never to let anyone distinguish between the real and the fake.

Life is a road, twisting and turning. Ever descending into the twilight at the far end of the valley. And you keep moving because stillness is not an option. Maneuvering unexpected turns and frightening overpasses, you hope to keep on the path as you proceed.

Life (part 2)

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Waiting

Waiting

At school, it is just another October day. With reading, maths, and those tiring group work sessions. Back home there is homework to be done, and as the application requesting dismissal of today’s chores is denied, there is no other way than to make them a quick affair. Hoping that their quality is maintained within acceptable limits.

Then dinner awaits. A few vegetables to be consumed as a starter for tonight’s feast on this, the sweetest of all the evenings.

Finally, outfit secured, candy bag ready, ready to step out into the October darkness, a short breather while waiting for the sister to get ready. It is going to be a hectic evening!

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Autumn

Autumn

Outside there is an explosion of colors.
Inside, all the colors have merged into the all familiar black.

The day still lets the sun shine its warmth.
The night grows colder and longer.

Even among the dead, a bearable moment in the brilliance of the last magical light.
Before the shadows return and, as always, the darkness repeats its sad mantra.